Ready - Set - Worry

Oct 23

Oblates Fr. Tim McIntire and Fr. Joe Newman.

A few weeks after my ordination I was gifted with a trip to visit Rome with my Oblate classmate, Fr. Tim McIntire, OSFS. Fr. Tim’s sister and brother-in-law joined us as we made our way through the Eternal City. This trip remains a great blessing in my life.

As newly ordained priests, Fr. Tim and I were encouraged to schedule a time to preside at Mass at St. Peter’s Basilica in Vatican City. Through the help of a few contacts, we received permission to celebrate Mass at the John Paul II side altar. We were thrilled! During our planning, I chose to be the concelebrant and preach while Fr. Tim agreed to be the main celebrant. When the time came, we went into the sacristy to vest. With so many Masses occurring at the side altars at St. Peter’s, the sacristy was bustling. The sacristan spoke to us in Italian. There was some initial confusion because he thought I was Fr. Tim’s altar server. Once we got that straightened out, we processed with a real altar server across St. Peter’s to the John Paul II side altar.

When retelling this story, Fr. Tim always says, “It may have been the worst Mass that I ever celebrated!” I think he is exaggerating, but there was one incident I still remember. To give some background, there are parts of the Eucharistic Prayer when the concelebrant may be invited to lead. Fr. Tim was meant to invite me as the concelebrant to step to the middle of the altar and lead portions of the Eucharistic Prayer. However, Fr. Tim completely forgot to include me as the concelebrant! Fr. Tim was so remorseful for this oversight that he has apologized to me from that day on. I was so delighted because I knew I could remind him of that oversight for the rest of our lives together.

I tell you this story because I can relate to Fr. Tim. We hear in the Gospels that we need to be vigilant, awake, and alert. From St. Francis de Sales we hear that true devotion is connected to good works that are ready and prompt. On that day at St. Peter’s we were all of those things: ready, vigilant, and prompt. However, at some point, we tipped from alertness to worry and anxiety. This tipping point happens all the time for me. I work to be careful and well-planned, but I tip to being impatient and short. I become closed off to God’s presence and Will in the moment. Maybe you can relate. Instead of anxiety or worry, maybe you are prone to fear or anger.

In St. Francis’ Spiritual Directory, there is a helpful insight that I have been trying in my life. During our Preparation of the Day, we are instructed to imagine our daily activities and discern a plan of action to best avoid any faults during the day. What is our plan to remain connected to God’s Will throughout the day? The insight comes during the final steps of our preparation. After all of our imagining and planning, we recall that our day will not match our plans, and we are not God. We make an act of giving God our souls, lives, hearts, memories, understandings, and wills. I remake this morning offering every time I hit the tipping point during the day. I have to do this again and again and again.

I commend to you, O gracious Lord, my soul, my life, my heart, my memory, my understanding, and my will. Grant that with and in all these, I may serve you, love you, please, and honor you forever.

May God be Praised!